Sorry- *edited*

Sorry, no blog tonight. I'm slightly behind in this evenings schedule (hear that...we are getting on a schedule...yay!) due to the tornadoes that whipped through this town and caused tons of damage. I now have a downstairs bathroom of blankets, books, snacks, candles, flashlights, shoes and helmets to clean up. Said to be the worst tornado in this areas history. Schools started letting kids out around 6:00...yet another reason I'm thankful we choose to home school. We are fine...but several families about a mile away are not. Homes vehicles and hospitals are damaged and roadways are blocked. Please keep all affected in your prayers.

***********************************
*****I was on the computer Google-ing something for Kalee when my computer mysteriously restarted. OoooK. That was weird. Meanwhile I heard the ice cream truck and gathered the kiddos so we could go splurge. As I walked out the neighbor across the street pulled in his driveway and said "Did you see the tornado?" Um, excuse me? Tornado? And I'm outside...why? That got me glued to the TV instantly. Sure enough I gathered the necessary belongings for us to live in the bathroom for a few hours....while listening to the TV. It was all happening right here...in the town where I live. I saw the local hospital a church friend works at and their 3 kids go to child care at damaged on TV. The strip mall right beside it. I saw video of the tornado right behind my favorite Ruby Tuesday's and where I attend church. Amazing the devastation...all about a mile away. Then I e-mailed Max to let him know we were OK because he would find out about it sooner or later...and made calls to those in that area. Later finding out a friend that I met in Yokosuka (and didn't know they PCS'd to this area until I found her at a park around the corner about 2 months ago) and her family were displaced. Her house is standing but not live-able. Windows busted out, debris every where. Her neighborhood was destroyed...and they have 2 girls under the age of 3...and was having a late play date. Windows started shattering and they ran to the bathroom...they did not hear it coming like most say they do. All are fine and un-injured but it's still heart wrenching!! My neighbor was at a Dr.'s appointment and her van window suffered damage due to a tree branch. Her 3 children were at home with a 14 year old babysitter. Hearing her story gives me chills up my spine. Imagine how a 14 year old would respond to a disaster like that with a 4, 2 1/2 and 14month old in her care. Imagine the Mom...having just experienced it herself. Scary! Fortunately several church families including mine have come together to assist in the after math. Still a few people unaccounted for but no fatalities directly related to the storm... just injuries. Makes me look at life from a different angle.
Devastating...purely shocking and devastating.*****

Not a Kid?

Me: "Kalee please clean your room...or I'm going in with a trash can and keeping your dollar" (she gets paid a dollar every time she cleans her room when I ask her to the first time...and 3 dollars if she cleans it without me asking)
K: "But Mom, I'm not a kid anymore!"
Me: "huh? Then what are you?"
K: "Your little lady and Daddy's favorite princess!"
Gosh I love my babies.

Can you guess what the bubble was made of?

Planting

It started with a bright idea of mixing the top soil in my garden. Yeah I didn't think of tilling it in until now. I'll figure out this compost stuff next. I have the perfect place in the corner of the yard to attempt that one and I still have to research it. This year I bought some crap from Lowe's to boost the soil. No really, I bought crap. Seriously when I was there an employee asked if they can help me find something. I replied "Yeah I can't find $^!#" Sure enough a 40 pound bag was on the ground right in front of me. I was using my sniffer to locate it...either it failed me or after living in Norco for 1/2 my life I'm just used to it. I got my hills and valleys all down pat... and decided to plant my cherry tomatoes. Remember how Bear wanted to water the pot using his own bodily fluids? Well I'm pleased to announce it's alive...and doing well! I transferred the tomatoes, corn, cucumber and sunflowers into the ground today. I'm waiting a bit longer before I relocate the spinach, beefsteak tomatoes, green bell pepper, spinach, green beans, wax beans, pumpkin and watermelon. Only time will tell if my singing kills them or helps them grow. I have called my Dad several times asking questions like "what should I do now that the roots are growing out of the bottom of the little pellet pod thing?" or "do sunflowers really need sun?"...funny enough he still has patients and is happily answering my stupid questions. It's funny how I go to Mom for some things and Dad for others. Mom can walk me through giving animals and reptiles CPR (she specializes in Iguanas) my Dad can identify a bug over the phone when he hears "Well Dad, they are small, have legs and white with a big rear end"...then I Google it and BINGO! Anyway, the lesson for today is...tomatoes are supposed to be red, not my back. OUCH!!!

Feed the...Birds.

We didn't make it to the library story time this morning. Why do they make it so early? I mean who has their kids ready to get out of the house by 8:30? Ok, ok- give me a break guys...you already know I'm not the norm. Instead we timed it just right to arrive right after the last story time child left the grounds. Which meant every "non-library" voice, all eyes were on us. After constantly using my loud whisper to get my son's attention to quit pulling books off the shelf ....I realized this branch had none of the books on Kalee's reading list for next week. Instead we got a dozen books not related at all to what we are learning. But how can I say no to a book? We go to the mall and she walks right past the toy store... but as we pass the book store she begs to go in...I can't deny her reading. She may read about how to manage time one day and tell me what I'm doing wrong. 'Well for starters Mom we should wake up when the rest of this coast does.' As I checked out, I sarcastically asked the librarian "Do you have a drive through window?" With a smile he replied "As a matter of fact you can reserve them and we will bundle the books for you to pick them up" Oh my gosh! I can place an order via phone or Internet and schedule a pick up? How cool is that?!?! Then Mr. Librarian said "People usually figure that out when they can't shop anymore." Obviously he was a quick observer...who possibly read about time management? As we were getting in the car I saw a very elderly lady pull a bag of something out of her car and sprinkle a handful in the grass. "Excuse me Ma'am? Is that bird seed?" In her sweetest voice she replied "Why yes, I just love hearing the birds sing. I keep a bag in the car and feed them here and at Wal-mart." We sat and watched them. I love the elderly.
Soooo, when was the last time you fed the birds at the library?

Earth Day

Happy Earth Day!!! This week I challange you to make one change in your life to make a difference. I bought "green" grocery bags...and learned that I get a discount for every reuseable bag when I bring them for use during my next shopping trip.

Look what I found my princess doing. She told me her baby needed to burn off some energy outside because she was acting like a nut. Well, if you ask me I think she swung the baby to sleep.
A little later this is what I found:
"Hey sweetie whatcha doin'?"
Didn't you know today is Earth Day? Helllloooo, I'm nursing her...you know saving pollution from bottle manufacturing and factories that make corn syrup solids with MSG containing ingredients formula ... and did you notice the cloth diaper made from your hand towel? Do you know how many diapers a child goes through before they get potty trained?

Ok...so she really didn't say that but it sounded good to me. We all know I have an ear for that "crunchy" stuff.

...and look what my son brought me while out getting fresh air:
It was a large one! I think all the rain from the past few days made him float away from home. Unless he dug a hole that I'll find at a later time...probably when I'm out using the lawn mower as a jogging stroller.

Instant High and Empty Tears

I'm pleased to report we made it to church this morning ON TIME! Actually, we walked in about 2 minutes early...amazing! If my time keeper...Max...isn't on me, almost backing the car out of the driveway before I step out... I seem to always arrive fashionably late. Too bad that fashion went outta style years ago. Where have I been? After lunch, Kalee helped me clip coupons. I'll never give those things up. It thrills me to look at a receipt and realize I save more then I spend. I mean, that's an instant high! Funny enough it's also the closest to a high I've ever been. Unless your talking about a sugar high, or lifting His name on high, or standing on the 6th station of Mt. Fuji high, or cooking on high?!?! Really, one little piece of paper makes me call the world and share how I got $65 worth of groceries for $8... and no, I'm not like my Mom ;) who had an outrageous back stock of shampoo and toothbrushes (I order my shampoo online anyway). I get non-instant food and produce! Kalee helped me clip them today, I'll teach her how to file them next, and finally use them so I can get a high off of listening to how much she saved.

Tonight I did something I have never done. Well let me start by saying Bear has had major separation issues with me. He won't even let me go to the toilet by myself.... ok so he never has but that's besides the point. I can't figure out what the problem is. The past few Awana meetings he has clung to me like crazy. I can't step out of the room to plop my rear in the hallway floor to read! My neighbor had a great suggestion. She would take my kids along with hers and drop them off and standby for a few minutes in case he started crying. Then he would not have the separation shock at the door. Well, I thought it was a great idea and it worked! I buckled him in and he waved to me. 15 minutes later (it's only about a 2 minute drive across the street) she returned saying he said my name once and she told him I would be back to get him after they had fun. Wow! How did I spend my hour and a half you might ask? I used it wisely by doing dishes, oiling the furniture, and I even got bible study time in. Shocking huh? I went to go pick him up and as I walked in everyone who was used to seeing me sit in the hall was telling me "Your gunna laugh". My instant thought was " great, what did he pee on?" but to my surprise the boy was passed out on the table! Yup! They said he fell asleep while coloring about 20 minutes before I arrived. As I put him in the car he looked up at me with an ear to ear grin and his arms tightened around my neck. "Hi, ah-mah!" "Hi baby, did you have a good time?" "Des (yes) big boy now, not baby ay-more." Yes, I had the empty tummy feeling...and tears.

I know, your probably still stuck on "Huh, Averi left her kids?" Glad to know I'm not the only one thinking that.

Take a Hike

I know. Why haven't I blogged? It's been days. When I got a phone call asking if I'm alright, I knew then that I was not the only one addicted to this thing. I mean, it's not like I have nothing to write about. As long as I have these kids I have plenty. I can talk about Bear assuming the peeing position on the top dip part of the little room heater... after I told him not to...yes, you guessed it, he peed. Or Kalee asking me if she keeps spiting watermelon seeds in the grass will they grow all over our backyard. Or about the night I went fishing....yeah, fishing in the bathtub for the pieces of the brown paper towel tube that was once a barbell the kids made at church. Did you know those things dissolve? Yeah they fall apart into tiny fibers which makes the bath water thick. Luckily I peeled the spit wad off the wall prior to it hardening. This week we also took a hike. We had a great time crunching leaves, drawing in the dirt, finding sticks, looking at a bazillion rolly-pollies under loose bark, inspecting a beautiful blue/greenish shiny bug and holding a pet caterpillar...that I swear was going to have to come home with us. The kids enjoyed every bit of nature God intended them to see that afternoon. I enjoyed...searching pockets for rocks and and verifying bugs were left in their home and not ours.
I thought this looked cool.
Not to worry my left hand was holding his foot. I had no desire to dive in after him once I saw the turtles.
My little Forrest ranger-ette!
Who you gunna call....BUG HUNTERS! (They ain't 'fraid of no bug)
All 5 of the kiddos "sittin' on the dock of the bay"......

Sing/Sign with me now....

Old Mac Donald had a ...(signing farm) E-I-E-I-O, and on his farm he had a ...
(signing sheep) E-I-E-I-O. And that old farmer also had a ...
(signing pig) and a...
(signing rooster)...ok you get it! He had lots of animals and so did this farm by the beach that we went to today. The kids had a blast. The turkeys had their feathers in a ruffle....which was beautiful. They gobbled back at everything we gobbled to them. The kids absolutely loved it!

We learned about peacocks and peahens which are all apart of the peafowl family. The above peacock was struttin' his stuff...chasing the peahen. The first time Bear heard the squeal his eyes got huge and walked backwards into me...it was rather funny. ...and Kalee...I can see her getting her first job on a farm of some snort! ;)

*Kalee has taken a HUGE interest in learning ASL...and funny enough her brother has followed. I was in 3rd grade before was I ever interested. I think it's cool that it's one of her desires and not me pushing it on her. So of coarse...what am I doing? Jumpin' on it like it's a race horse! At's my girl!

Bag Lady?!?!

Ok, I have been Bagged Tagged:
Here is what you do:
1.Take a picture of your bag (purse, diaper bag, briefcase) do the one that you use daily with all of your stuff in it.
2.Show a picture of ALL the contents in your bag. NO CLEANING OUT FIRST!!!!
3."Bag Tag" five people.** You do not need to name everything in your bag if you don't want to but it kinda makes it fun just to see how much crap everyone has in their purses/bags.

Now really...who would care what I had in my bag? Then I looked at it and laughed. I prove the saying "the bigger the boobs the bigger the bag" WRONG!!!. My bag has gotten larger over the years, and well...I have had 2 reductions...Kalee and Bear.


Here is my bag-



I kept telling a friend not to look at me if hers was missing....shortly later she bought me the same one. I still love it.



All the crap!





Ingredients to create a bag suitable for my lifestyle:

• a hooter hider that I made
• 2 diapers
• wipies
• 2 pair of waterproof underwear
• 1 pair of spider man boxer briefs
• a pair of sweats
• 2 pair of socks...I learned his accidents end up in socks too
• a plastic grocery bag to put the wet clothes in
• gum
• eco-friendly Tough and Tender wipes for high chairs before I put him in them
• crunched colored goldfish
• Nutri-grain bars
• fruit snacks that we call candy because they don't get it often
• Chick-Fil-A mints...I have to grab a handful every visit because they are so yummy
• half eaten bag of dried apricots.
• a "learn Italian" cd that came in the Chick-Fil-A kids meal. I love that place!
• a plastic Bear from "Bear in the big blue house"...never know when I'll have to consult him for directions to Walmart
• hair clip
• wallet
• Bluetooth
• chap-stick, lip gloss, lip liner, and compact that is all approved by this "crunchy"
• a book...just in case I sit at a red light too long.
• a horse calender...it's really Bears
• a camouflage first aid kit for those unexpected knee scrapes
• a wallet...that's full of receipts and foreign currency that I have yet to remove
• phone guide for the bases around this area...in case I have to call the hospital to let them know I'm on my way
• a watch I got from a church I do Mopettes for...no I don't mop the place...I care for kiddos
• tissues for the long green snakes that recently have been escaping Bear's brain and diving into his mouth
• a gift card to a local grocery store for doing one of those stupid surveys
• tickets to the Air and Space museum when my Mom was here and a flier with gum stuck in the middle of it....gross huh?
• a half wrapped bent straw. I have no clue how this found it's way in there!
• AND last but not least.... trash! Kalee knows not to litter. Instead my bag is a trash can.

Notice I don't have a phone or keys? That's because they have 2 legs and always run from this mess!

I must say I glad I got bag tagged. This has forced me to clean it out and I even threw the bag in the washer because it was disgusting.

Now I tag whoever wants to clean out their bag!

Till- do it's part...

I decided that this is the year to plant a garden. My family is important to me and I want the best, freshest, most nutritionist produce for them. I'm no English major...can ya tell? So in preparation, my neighbor offered to lend me his rototiller. I took him up on this offer today because after all....it was beautiful outside. Who would want to be couped up inside after a week of dreary weather?!?! He brought it to my mailbox. I stared at it. I admit...the thing looked intimidating. It was much larger then the one that my brother chased at about 6 years old. So he showed me the 8 steps it took to start it....explained it was an automatic...and how to put it in drive gear....and cut it off. Great! I can do this! I finished washing the cars. Finally I put everything away to head in the back yard with this large piece of machinery that I swear one should have a licence to use. " I told Kalee to stand by with the phone and reminded her how to dial 9-1-1 just in case. We also had a refresher course on stop, look, and listen before you cross the street...you know, just in the event I needed the neighbor to watch the kids while the ambulance rushed me to the hospital. She and Bear were happily caged in the trampoline...in case I too had a run-a-way. I got all my bases covered!

As I return to the rototiller...I stared at it....circled it....trying to figure out how to start it again. I casually check the mailbox and blurt "Hey Russ I don't wanna screw this up would you remind me how to start it again?" Thankfully he chuckled and started it for me. I got it in the back yard and discovered it was rather easy to use. I only planned on doing about a 4x10 area....but hey, this was making the job easy as pie...mud pie. The moist cold dirt felt great between my toes...until I saw a bug....and a worm...and a worm with a million legs. I quickly discovered bugs lived in dirt. Yes I tilled barefoot, I did not want dirt in my shoes...so I slipped on my flip flops! Blame the OCD. It was safe. The rear tiller thingies had a guard on it. That thing did great. I had it set to less then 4 inches and found some tree roots and a sprinkler head. Hey nobody warned me to look for those! I couldn't figure out what the other thing was...but I found a yellow cap loose in the dirt. (my theory is to blog about it now and when Max discovers it I can say "Oh sorry Babe, I thought I told you about that already")

Now I get to remove all the grass clumps and make "mountains and valleys" as I used to call it as a child. My Dad always told me to not step on ____....and for the life of me I could never remember what ___ was. So to only do half wrong I would step one foot in the valley and one on the mountain. I think I'll plant the seeds on the mountains...and if everything dies this year I'll do the valleys next time... I'll keep you posted on what color my thumb is. I'm hoping since I can't cook I can garden. I gotta be good at something other then producing milk.

So that 4x10 turned into....umm....well.....who measures anyway?

After today I consider myself "well rounded"...not because I tilled my yard...because I just ate 1/2 a bag of salt water taffy while typing this blog...to please my readers...Thanks guys!!!!

School

I didn't blog last night. I'm sure you know though. Instead I had to get Kalee's work in order and get to bed by 5:00...Somewhere!

If your a regular reader you probably realize, I'm weird. I never imagined being a weird Mom...but compared to others I am. Between using 'green' products, cloth diapering, baby food making, extended breastfeeding, non-child care using, homeschooling...oh the list could go on but you get the idea- I realize I am not the 'norm'. That's OK though...I do it all for a reason. If others took time to research the benefits...or realize how ingredients in personal care and cleaning products are linked to cancer... they too would probably lean "crunchy" route in life. I'm always willing to share my reasoning for why I do certain things so feel free to ask anytime.

On that note- I have found another homeschooling family here that I met at church. I thought it was kinda weird how Bear took to them in Wee-Worship and had no issues separating...but at AWANAS he wants me right in the Puggles classroom with him (oppose to sitting in the hall doing my Bible study). This is also the same family's house we went to for the Easter Egg-stravanganza when he fed their pet deer chocolate. Naturally she and I talk about homeschooling and she told me about this place that re-sells curriculum's. Some new, some used, but it was way cheaper then ordering it online and pay shipping. I walked in and my head almost exploded. I need a kid less evening to wander the store. A homeschoolers paradise I tell ya! Kalee is flying through Kindergarten...that we just started. Because of the birthday cutoff she's not due to start Kindergarten til Fall. I'm watering it down for Bear who at age 2 participates about 60% of the time. When she's through with Kindergarten I plan on slipping right into first grade. Now is when I really realize the amount of hours I have spent reading on a daily basis... pay off!

Her Salad

So you come to my blog to read about my day...thinking I'm actually going to tell you about it. Well, ok, your right. Let me start by saying I set my alarm clock for 08:00. Surely I didn't get up then...I have to keep the routine of hitting it at least twice. I'm getting better though. In high school I had 4 alarm clocks...my pager (does that age me or what?), an alarm clock by my bed, my stereo alarm, and the other alarm clock I borrowed from my brother (come to think of it I don't think it was ever returned) that was across the room on a high shelf so I had to stand up and walk. But what really woke me up was my Mom coming in my room "Averi it's 6" knowing my ride came by 10 after 6. I would jump up like a bee stung me in the rear. I don't even react that way to hearing "Mom look what brothers doing" anymore. Back to this morning. I decided to get up a bit earlier then the kiddos. I was determined to make myself a cup of coffee and not have to share it. Or to check my e-mail without a monkey climbing on my back. Funny how I noticed when I checked my e-mail that it was 07:15...yeah...that early! My alarm clock was an hour fast! How did I manage that? I got more done in that hour then I have all week! I did 2 loads of laundry, drank a cup of coffee, checked my e-mail and responded to the select few people that permit me to be their friends, vacuumed downstairs, cleaned a bathroom and got cleaned up... all without yelling "No Max, your sisters tea pot is not a toilet!"

Tonight Kalee told me she wanted to make salad for dinner. Salad and leftovers are good enough for me! She insisted on preparing it herself. She washed and peeled then I chopped the veggies and she added every thing together. We sat down at the table and she served her brother and I. Since Bear ran off to the bathroom with his bowl I decided to follow him...with his history there's no saying what he'd do with it. I came back to the dinner table to find a pool of ranch dressing on my plate. "Thanks for the salad dressing babie but it belongs on TOP of the salad". She replied "I knoooow Mooom, open your eyes, I put salad on the plate first." "Ohhh...yeah. I see the carrot sliver and 2 pieces of lettuce now." For those that have never seen me eat salad...I hate dripping leaves! Salad dressing is always on the side and dip my fork about 1/4 of an inch before loading it with salad...if I opt for dressing at all that day. So I got the privilege of choking down a tablespoon of ranch on a piece of lettuce while saying "Boy, your going to have to make this for Daddy when he gets home. He's gunna love it!" I wonder where she gets her Betty Crocker gene from?
Off to lay down...my stomach hurts.

*Note- I was looking to link a pee story to the word 'history' when I realized this whole blog is about peeing. Peeing in plants, peeing in Japanese toilets, peeing in a trash can, peeing in popcorn, peeing on balls, coloring a pee-pee, flush n' pee...I can go on but it's easier for you to type "pee" in the search bar on the top left you'll see the list.

Vacuuming Issues

Patients. I need patients. Somebody find me a good website to buy some?

I woke up this morning with intentions of doing a few things around the house. Most of all I wanted to sweep and vacuum. It seems like I'm always talking about vacuuming huh? I often look at my vacuum and think 'it's a good thing Max got me a nice one because it's become a piece of furniture'. It's turned on more then the lights in Vegas, thanks to my kids. I'm thinking it's time to invent a self vacuuming carpet. Recently I realized I have issues. Well, truth is I have known I have issues but just realized how bad they are. I caught myself telling the kids "Quit walkin' on the carpet, your messing up my lines". My poor girl just looked at me puzzled. Why do I only think it's clean if the lines are visible? I know I just ran the vacuum 10 minutes ago...but insist on doing it again...unless it's the stairs.

I get to make homemade macaroni and cheese tonight for Bible study. I have it planned out perfectly. When I realize I burned it (with my track record is bound to happen when we smell it) I'll grab another casserole dish, stick it in the oven to warm it up, wrap it in foil and towels, swing past the local grocery store on my way out... filler up.. and Voila...macaroni and cheese!

Let-er-Rip

Can ya guess what I did today? Clean? What made you think that? Gosh I love talking to myself. Yes I cleaned. I needed to vacuum the colored-fish crumbs that Bear ground into the car seat. Colored ones...not orange ones. Why do they call orange fish 'goldfish'? Doesn't make sense. Then they have a 'Go-fish' game...that for the longest time I thought was called 'Goldfish'. Enough fish talk. My little shrimp Kalee wanted the colored goldfish...but as far as I knew they were only in little packages. Me being the thrifty person that can stretch a buck across the state of Texas...said only if they make them in the large box. I knew they didn't so I was planning on going home with the whole grain ones. Well, I ate my words. Now we are half way through a box of colored fish. Not to worry...my kids haven't eaten them. They have mistaken my car for a home...a funeral home after Bear crunched them.


I know where am I going with it...


While I was vacuuming I sat in the car and felt like I sat on something. Naturally I jumped and screamed thinking it was a mouse. Felt nothing so I went on my merry way. Then while I was in the kitchen...where I don't belong...Kalee told me:

"Mom, did you know you have a hole in your butt?"

"I sure do! So do you and brother and Daddy...that's what God gave us to..."

"No Mom not a butt hole! You have a hole in your butt"

"Um, I'm confused. What's the difference?"

"(sigh) Your jeans Mom! (talking with her hands like she's full blooded Italian) You have a hole in your butt jeans."


Wow! Hopefully no one had binoculars zoomed in on my pink and white Bambi panties. There go my favorite pair of pants. Darn, looks like I have to make a trip to Kohl's (Mom got me addicted to that place).

Powder Fresh

Many know I don't use powder on my babies...and if you didn't, you know now! Don't ask...unless of coarse you want a really long explanation that includes why I don't use most baby bath, baby shampoo, diaper wipes, soap, make-up, shampoo/conditioner, deodorants, toothpaste, moisturizers, chap-stick, air fresheners, household cleaners, laundry detergents, fabric softeners, bleach, or products with bleach...ICK, I refuse to use bleach...and vitamins. I didn't say I don't brush my teeth or take a shower! It's safe to come visit me. What I mean is I'm selective on which products I use and I don't buy them from Walmart or the Commissary where the average Joe would. OK, the average Joe-military that shops at the Commissary would. Anyway...back to the powder. This could be one of the reasons I don't use it...

Whatcha think? My back was turned while I was getting the vacuum (after taking this picture)....Kalee the little helper she is, got my vinegar/water spray bottle and a towel....how did I get so lucky to now clean up paste?!?!?!

For the record, I think this was the same bottle from when Kalee was little...and it was full. I only kept it to put down if we ever had an ant problem. This wouldn't of happened if I didn't have to slave over a hot stove to warm up leftovers.