Our 52 Hour Adventure

You probably observed how it's been awhile since I have posted. Well, do you really want my lame excuse? Chemo killed almost all my brain cells! I'm trying to grow me some new ones...better then before....so hang in there.

The Friday before Christmas we took off visit family in Kentucky. We did this trip before so it shouldn't have been that big of a deal. Max got off work on Friday, came home to change and load the car and we were on our way. When traveling we usually leave super early so by the time the kids actually wake up we are due to gas up and stop for breakfast. We decided to do the 'not usual' and leave Friday afternoon to beat the expected Saturday evening snow. Well instead, we drove into the blizzard! Not the plan! It wasn't my first snow driving experience. We have lived in Rhode Island and when we lived off base (in base housing) in Japan we had to commute in the stuff. I'm comfortable if the roads have been plowed. I will say this was my first 'I can't see the lines in the road' driving experience. When we got stuck the first time (yes, happened more then once) I put the car in park and made Max drive. This Californian doesn't have ice skating behind the wheel training that Max had because he grew up on a mountain. Per Max' pet peeve, we kept a full gas tank....and it saved our butts. The only Wal-mart that was open happened to have chains. All food places closed and even most gas stations were a ghost town. The freeway went to a complete stop at 10:30pm. We parked, people actually got out and stretched. Kids were sleeping and we didn't move until about 4am. By then a plow had to come through and not only make way for everyone, but dig some people out. We got 22 inches of snow where our car was parked that night! Once we got moving again we probably went up about 10 car lengths when the big rig that was creeping 2 cars in front of us did a slow motion slide into a jack-knifed rig. Once again we were parked, but that time only for about 3 hours until a tow truck pulled them out. Drove for a hour and parked for two was the cycle all day Saturday. Max and I talked about how long it took people like my Nana and Papa to travel from upstate New York to Florida for the summer in the 50's...or how long it took people in the covered wagon days. Gas got down to about 1/2 a tank again so we were due to stop. We found the ONLY restaurant open and decided to go for a good filling meal since the previous night's dinner consisted of pretzels, chips, water and nuts. So we enjoyed conversation with some strangers at IHOP and called around to book a room because it was just way to dangerous to be on the road. Every room on the exit was booked! We couldn't even go to the next exit they CLOSED the 64 while we were eating! The strangers (Grandma, Daughter and 2 Granddaughters) told us they got a room down the road but they had to clean it and change the sheets themselves...and if we couldn't find anything, go to their room. We spent 2 hours driving and walking to hotels to find a room but NOTHING was open. At that point we just wanted a shower so I called to see if I could get me and the kids up to shower and change clothes. They insisted we stay and had no problem with us bringing our dog up too. As tired as we were, we sure did enjoy conversation with those ladies and all 4 kids played, jumped, danced and stretched out well together. Sunday morning the freeway opened up at 10am. After a good breakfast we got back on the road and it was smooth sailing. It took us 52 hours to hear "you have reached your destination" and let me tell you, those were some sweet, sweet words!

The kids did great! It actually surprised us. For those that knew we were traveling, we are thankful for your prayers of safe travels.

Strange how when I drove home we actually got somewhere. We made it back in 11hours. :)

Weirdness

It's amazing how a cute scarf, pair of heels, and a good bra make me feel like a woman!

I found the perfect hair spiking glue.

If I spoke the same words I say every day in a voice changer, I wonder if my kids would know it's me speaking.

I'm getting myself psychologically ready to be anti-sweets again.

Certain brands of hand sanitizer taste funny, stink and feel weird. I know what your thinking...and no, I don't eat it. If I eat a cracker I touch, I can taste it. If I eat it with no hands, I look weird. So that's why I only buy Purell!

Nana's visit

My mom came to visit for Kalee's birthday party this past weekend. Here are some random pictures while she was here.

Of course we took her to one of our favorite places recently, the Aquarium. Kalee was able to show Nana how to identify all 4 species of sting rays that the touch pool had; Cownose, Roughtail, Southern, and Atlantic.

My little Lady.

Handsome Ham!

Rockin' Rudolph.

They love each other....most of the time.

Nana and her baby girl.

Me and my love. Look at the hair...look at the hair...look at the hair! I finally have some! :)

Bear started Basketball. He sure did enjoy his first practice. I will be amazed if the coach returns. Those little 4 year olds are only concerned with the color of ball they have. Wonder whats going to happen when they realize only one ball is needed for the game?

Kalee started Tai Kwan Do. On day one, her feet were glued to the yellow line and she was as frozen as a popsicle. The second time she went, she volunteered and participated way more then I expected. Strangely enough my popsicle observed all the moves from day one and was able to explain and demonstrate them. Time will tell if this is something that continues to be her interest. :)

My interest? To hunt down the laundry monster.

Our Thanksgiving Weekend

For Thanksgiving my Dad and Brother came out from California. We thoroughly enjoyed the visit. Max and Bub went hunting but secretly I think the deer were laughing as they passed by watching them text each other. I did figure out how to get them home on a chilly morning...text them a picture of the steaming coffee pot. :)

Kalee, Bear and Uncle making faces.

Kalee and Grandpa playing Scrabble. She's my lil genius...just needs a pair of glasses. :)

Max waking up Bub with a dog butt. Who needs an alarm clock with that?

Kalee and Grandpa making cookies. Unlike when I was a kid, he actually remembered the sugar.

Grandpa tasked Bear with licking the spatula.

Can you see them?

Lincoln logs are the best!

Showing off her reading skills.

Me and Bub.

Max and Me.

My Dad and I took the kids to the Virginia Aquarium to check out the new exhibit. Kalee, my observant child was very interested in the horseshoe crabs "getting a ride". Great memory for when we start discussing reproduction again. Something must have been in the water because there were lots of "pairs".

We had fun and already can't wait to see either of them again.

Four year well baby

Bear had his 4 year well baby appointment. He is 40.4 lbs., 3'4" tall and is in the 85-90 percentile...which is amazing that he is ON the chart. In the past he was so big that the doctors couldn't even chart him. Oh, you don't believe me? Look at his first fat year.

Maximiliano IV, one day old.

About 4 months old. Fat finger and cheeks.

Six months old. I promise he's not wearing rubber bands on his arms. :)

About 8 months old. My little tub-a-lub.

On his first birthday. Those cheeks are still just as kissable. :)

I wasn't lying huh?

The Dr. asked if he would pee in a cup to screen for diabetes since it runs so heavily on both sides of our families. I laughed! Um, lets see. Put it on the other side of the room and make him aim. No problem! She called back with the results and Max answered the phone. Evidently Bear is "normal". Interesting! Never thought I'd hear those words. :)

And now he's stalling when it's bedtime...yup, he must be normal.

Random Babbles

Checking out 45 Christmas related library books isn't so bad after all.

I wonder how turkey on the grill would turn out?

I think I might be able to pomade and spike my hair by Christmas.

I get the Mommy tickle every time I hear Bear recite his Awana verse "My eyes have seen the fow-fa-chin (salvation)".

People are put in my life (and me in theirs) for a reason. I'm learning to be thankful for not only the comfortable friendships, but the spiritual sand paper relationships and even those I can't seem to shake because we're somehow related. :) I love how they all have taught me something in life.

I'm thankful for my computer. I can research ways to better myself, improve my parenting and remind myself how my hate for television does not make me well rounded.

Speaking of rounded, someone needs to pry this bag of marshmallows from my hand before I turn into one!

Broken Stove

My oven and stove are broke! Good thing I had an electric frying pan to make chili for dinner. Replaced cornbread with rice because of the oven and um....that was an interesting combo. I have to get creative with my meal menu and adapt to (grill on non-rainy days) crock pot/electric frying pan cooking. Max ordered the part needed and paid bank for fast shipping but it's not due to arrive until Tuesday. That is perfect! Just in time for me to be thankful for a cooked turkey!

I have found all that I lost as a result of chemo....well, except my brain cells. My weight increased with my appetite and lots of hairs came back...yes plural... you should see my arms and sideburns. My lungs were weak, but since I held my breath and dove into cardio, I feel a huge difference already. By the way, since leaving the "Golden State" I have had no problems with asthma. Amazing! You CAN trust air that you don't see! :) I got my butt whoopedtook a step class on Thursday and walked out feeling like Jello on a sugar high. It's amazing how one day I couldn't make it up the stairs...but now I'm craving cardio again thanks to my God!

So to be honest, I feel like....um, well...a masculine female without muscles. O.o I'm a flip flop, jeans and a t-shirt kind of person but I feel like I need to wear pink, add a scarf, hoops, and heels to look like a lady.

...Or maybe I just need to lift and inflate the girls!

I am Thankful!

I am thankful that I have most of my energy back. After the beginning of the year I'll work on the strength part. :) Overall, I feel great!

Also, I'm waiting on recent test results. I did end up getting a PET scan on Monday...yes, Bear's Birthday. When I went in for my port flush last Thursday they told me I needed to keep the original scan date and not push it back like we planned on because of timing with insurance. Next month I have the CT scan and followup appointment. Hopefully I'll have results of the PET on Monday. :)

My Boy is 4!

Four years ago we welcomed our baby boy Maximiliano, AKA: Bear, into the world. Where has the time gone? On Sunday we had his Hot Wheels party and the highlight was seeing him smile. That boy has brought me 4 years of pure laughs. I love him!

Happy Birthday Buddy-Boy!

I'm still catching up on pictures and recovering from our DC trip that I want to blog more about. Sorry I'm slow.

Our Nations Capitol!

A friend from our high school days Kelly is out visiting us. We took a trip to Washington D.C. and met up with our other friend Renee who was a great tour guide. We had a great time and plan to go back so Kalee can start checking things to see off her scroll. Upon our arrival we toured the Capitol building. Renee was an intern there so we got our fill of details. That building is amazing! We also toured the Library of Congress. Beautiful! The most touching Memorial was the Vietnam Memorial. I walked away choked up.

Us four in the Library of Congress. Just in case you don't recognise me bandanna-less, I'm on top. Yes, I have me some hair now! :)

WWII Memorial

Washington Monument. I like the picture with the obelisk behind us.

My babies playing with pebbles in the National Mall.

Hanging around on Madison Street.

I have more pictures here if your interested.

I can't wait to go back! Can you believe this was my first family "vacation"? Usually we vacation to visit family...or one time I went with my friends family to vacation (and still have great memories Sarah). I might just get use to this! My kids had smiles and we definitely enjoyed visiting with our friends.

Thanks Kelly and Renee for great memories and for your help chasing, reading to, answering questions, and holding my kids hands. :)

I..........

Can't...........

STOP!!!!!

I'm on a roll. Tell you about it soon.

Trip to Colonial Williamsburg

Last weekend Renee, one of our friends from high school came down from Washington DC. She made us a delicious vegan meal that we could have pulled past Max pretty darn easily, and we enjoyed some "remember when" stories. We were sorry Ryan couldn't make it down with her but we plan on heading up their direction soon. :)

After my gourmet organic oatmeal with flax seed breakfast, we took the ferry to Colonial Williamsburg. The colors of Fall complimented the area very well. Renee was awesome at explaining things to Kalee and pointing things out to spark her interest. :)

Me and Renee

We watched the reading of the Declaration of Independence and the drummer boys followed.

One of the skits that I honestly didn't follow much because I was trying to keep bear from kicking rocks and stirring up commotion.

Gorgeous tree and the shack behind it was the kitchen on The Great Hopes Plantation.

Behind the kitchen Renee demonstrated this nifty device used to make life easier in this time. Kalee said today it's easier to get it from the fridge.

Oh, this works like that?

Me and my babie.

I'm telling you, the scenery was enough to make me want to go back weekly! Go ahead, call me an Autumn junkie.

This place was so hands on. We learned a game called Shut the Box, saw the alphabet puzzle that was missing two letters, played with some of the toys, and they got to see what kinds of things children of those days carried in their bags. Renee explained why the slave girl had a permit and since then, Kalee has elaborated on it more each time it's told. Sometimes my girl has an imagination that blows me away.
The end!

We hope to return to that beautiful historical place next weekend. :)

Learning Laughs...

Today we have been learning about the Declaration of Independence in preparation for a field trip to Washington DC. While doing the crossword quiz, I asked Kalee how many and the names of the people who signed the Declaration of Independence. Bear blurted out "I know, I know, five.....John McCain"!

Buahahahaha! WOW! Definitely caught me off guard! He's not that old son!

Oh, I just love listening to my opera singer sing the "13 Colonies" to the tune of Yankee Doodle. :)

Just like me.

Why does my night owl of a daughter do so much better with school work late at night? It amazes me that she retains the information and has a longer attention span during the evening...but drives me nuts at the same time. Most children do best first thing in the morning. Then again I realize we are not raising "most children" and quite honestly I like the flexibility of being able to do activities out of the house during the day. Hum... change the habit, or roll with the punches? It's a toss up. She gets up early and usually in a great mood if we wake her...but if we don't, sleeping beauty won't rise until late morning. She's just like me! *sigh* ;)

First Bread Adventure

I hate the TV!

I know, I just lost my entire following with the above statement. But do you realize how much it influences society? Have you thought about what else you could spend your time doing? Or even how much it costs annually? I'd rather vacation!

After yelling politely requesting for the kids to turn the TV off for the third time, Bear spent some time looking at library books while Kalee and I baked bread and a pumpkin roll. I have to pretend like I know what I'm doing in the kitchen...at least while she has an interest in it. One thing is for sure, both my children know how to operate my Kitchen Aid... and I'm thinking that isn't a good thing either. Before long Bear will be mixing his own gun powder and mastic concoction. EEKS! There was something magical about that home made bread I tell you. Kalee brought her Daddy a warm buttered slice while he was working on his homework, and passed the test with flying colors. There have been occasions that Max looks at me with that "please save me" look and I have to redirect Kalee elsewhere to dispose of the goods...but this was definately not one of those times.

I have been feeling awesome. After being beat down so much with chemo I have really learned to appreciate some of the small things in life. Just because I took a nice spill and got the wind knocked out of me when I walked backwards into the dishwasher... and ended up bruised on my arm, ribs and knee, doesn't mean I should drug myself up and lay on the couch. Go ahead and laugh, Max did. Don't make me explain how I did that though because I'll pull the "chemo brain" card, which isn't much different than "pregnancy brain" other then it lasting longer. Irregardless of how sore I am, I thoroughly enjoyed another baking lesson with my baby girl. We covered science (watching yeast rise), math (measuring ingredients), language arts (reading directions) and tonight she has to Google the history of bread making. Woot-woot..and it was a lesson on Sunday, double pat on back! Dang I'm good! :)

I don't want to get back in the before cancer groove. I think I like creating this "new normal". My laundry will still be around tomorrow!

May I Have Your Attention Please?!?!?!

Friends, Family, and stalkers...I have something to share with you.

To quickly recap on the series of events this year:

(on the right you can click on March, April, and so on to read my previous posts)

-December- I noticed a little lump on the left side of my neck.

-January- I returned from my brothers wedding in California and learned a friend Rachel lost her battle to Melanoma Cancer. Quickly prompted me to make an appointment. Was told to "watch" the lump. None of my family or friends liked that answer and I became a "bulldog" and asked for a second opinion. Blood work was normal and once again told to watch it. Thought I was possibly turning psycho???

-February- Valentines Day to be exact, the ship was due to pull in. I was sicker than a dog. Made appointment to be seen on my way to pick Max up from the pier. Told a different Doctor then the previous two that I had lumps on my neck and had no clue why. After testing positive for strep and him feeling 4 abnormally swollen lymph nodes, one under the clavicle was the size of a gulf ball, he ordered me a CT Scan.

-March- CT results read suspicious. Realized I may not be psycho. :) Privileged enough to experience a Fine Needle Aspiration. Still inconclusive, I had a full biopsy. Results confirmed Nodular Sclerosis Hodgkin's Lymphoma Cancer. Completed all tests needed to bring to my Oncologist.

-April- My first experience on Valium for a bone marrow biopsy. Found out I was Stage 3. Medi-port was put in and four days later on Thursday April 23, I started chemotherapy.

I will summarize May, June, July, August, and September with "WOW! That was a wild ride!"

October- Last of my 12 treatments. More testing...in which only God could control the grade for.

Yeah, so, that brings me to my appointment today. Did I drag it on long enough? Oh, I almost forgot to mention, I have the best smelling pumpkin candle. What? You don't care about that!

(drum roll please)

Dr. A gave me permission to tell my blog reading mafia that my CT scan came back CLEAN! So clean in fact that I don't have to get the PET scan that was rescheduled for next month (due to TRICARE only covering 1 scan every 3 months). My spleen looked normal. The 'spot' in my chest is still in the report but is not of concern (may be scar tissue) and we successfully killed the aliens that were growing in my neck!

Now all I have to do is pay close attention to my body, go in to get my port flushed every 6 weeks (keeping it for 6-12 months) and report for PET/CT scans every 12 weeks. :)

Did you catch all that? Difficult test, not only for me but for my family. Gave it to God! He told me "Do not be afraid" and lookie now... REMISSION! Thank you Jesus!

At one point I did feel ill-equipped and under prepared. I rebuked the attack but welcomed God to use me in His service. Just as I tell my children "I'm telling you to do ____ for a reason", the Lord told me to host a ladies group (in which we named Girls Gone Godly). Once I finally listened (yes, I resisted at first) he equipped me. We do what we can do and trust God to do what only he can do. As a friend mentioned at study on Wednesday 'God doesn't call the equipped, he equips the called'.

This doesn't mean to stop praying. It just means I landed on the other side, on two feet but I'm still gripping His hands. The ride will only be over when I'm with Him. Obviously today's not my time.

For some odd reason I'm doing the unthinkable. I'm posting "unseen" pictures. Maybe so those from a distance can see the change? I dono.

May 9th. 16 days after my first treatment. I was pushing my hair back in my head that day. Julie blessed us with family pictures...I still choke up over these. :) We shaved my head the day after these were taken.

Mothers Day 2009 we called an emergency hair shaving meeting in our backyard because it was falling out in chunks.

Yes, the clippers hurt. Sensitive head.

An icky after treatment day. Not feeling so hot.

My birthday! Weird fuzz with a little shine. Never mind the crazy bald neighbor behind me. :)

Me responding to the "how do you feel?" question.

Proof that one can smile through discomfort and pain after treatment even if they have no make up on.

...and again. I lived in pajamas after treatment. Medi-port is visible. I never try to hide it. My theory...why hide cancer? Awareness may save someones life.Treatment #11. Almost makeup-less and making a scarf.

Tomorrow I will have Max take pictures of my head. I think my hair is understanding it's time to return. :)

Thank you all for following, listening, helping, feeding, and praying for me and my family these past 7 moths. We appreciate it more then words can express.

Do not be afraid; only believe. (Mark 5:36)

For nothing is impossible with God. (Luke 1:37)

Cast all your anxiety on Him because he cares for you. (1Peter 5:7)

I know, I know!

Hold your horses and get your panties out of a wad. :)

Brace yourself because I have got some news for you!

I'm working on a post in between a million other things. Soon enough, I promise!

PS- I'm wearing a smile. :)

My Punkin's at the Pumpkin Patch!

I can hide behind this one.

Oh yeah? Well, I can pick it up!

Me and my Punkins!

Kalee eyeballing the pumpkin she wants to carve.

He put those red socks on all by himself! Stinker!