May I Have Your Attention Please?!?!?!

Friends, Family, and stalkers...I have something to share with you.

To quickly recap on the series of events this year:

(on the right you can click on March, April, and so on to read my previous posts)

-December- I noticed a little lump on the left side of my neck.

-January- I returned from my brothers wedding in California and learned a friend Rachel lost her battle to Melanoma Cancer. Quickly prompted me to make an appointment. Was told to "watch" the lump. None of my family or friends liked that answer and I became a "bulldog" and asked for a second opinion. Blood work was normal and once again told to watch it. Thought I was possibly turning psycho???

-February- Valentines Day to be exact, the ship was due to pull in. I was sicker than a dog. Made appointment to be seen on my way to pick Max up from the pier. Told a different Doctor then the previous two that I had lumps on my neck and had no clue why. After testing positive for strep and him feeling 4 abnormally swollen lymph nodes, one under the clavicle was the size of a gulf ball, he ordered me a CT Scan.

-March- CT results read suspicious. Realized I may not be psycho. :) Privileged enough to experience a Fine Needle Aspiration. Still inconclusive, I had a full biopsy. Results confirmed Nodular Sclerosis Hodgkin's Lymphoma Cancer. Completed all tests needed to bring to my Oncologist.

-April- My first experience on Valium for a bone marrow biopsy. Found out I was Stage 3. Medi-port was put in and four days later on Thursday April 23, I started chemotherapy.

I will summarize May, June, July, August, and September with "WOW! That was a wild ride!"

October- Last of my 12 treatments. More testing...in which only God could control the grade for.

Yeah, so, that brings me to my appointment today. Did I drag it on long enough? Oh, I almost forgot to mention, I have the best smelling pumpkin candle. What? You don't care about that!

(drum roll please)

Dr. A gave me permission to tell my blog reading mafia that my CT scan came back CLEAN! So clean in fact that I don't have to get the PET scan that was rescheduled for next month (due to TRICARE only covering 1 scan every 3 months). My spleen looked normal. The 'spot' in my chest is still in the report but is not of concern (may be scar tissue) and we successfully killed the aliens that were growing in my neck!

Now all I have to do is pay close attention to my body, go in to get my port flushed every 6 weeks (keeping it for 6-12 months) and report for PET/CT scans every 12 weeks. :)

Did you catch all that? Difficult test, not only for me but for my family. Gave it to God! He told me "Do not be afraid" and lookie now... REMISSION! Thank you Jesus!

At one point I did feel ill-equipped and under prepared. I rebuked the attack but welcomed God to use me in His service. Just as I tell my children "I'm telling you to do ____ for a reason", the Lord told me to host a ladies group (in which we named Girls Gone Godly). Once I finally listened (yes, I resisted at first) he equipped me. We do what we can do and trust God to do what only he can do. As a friend mentioned at study on Wednesday 'God doesn't call the equipped, he equips the called'.

This doesn't mean to stop praying. It just means I landed on the other side, on two feet but I'm still gripping His hands. The ride will only be over when I'm with Him. Obviously today's not my time.

For some odd reason I'm doing the unthinkable. I'm posting "unseen" pictures. Maybe so those from a distance can see the change? I dono.

May 9th. 16 days after my first treatment. I was pushing my hair back in my head that day. Julie blessed us with family pictures...I still choke up over these. :) We shaved my head the day after these were taken.

Mothers Day 2009 we called an emergency hair shaving meeting in our backyard because it was falling out in chunks.

Yes, the clippers hurt. Sensitive head.

An icky after treatment day. Not feeling so hot.

My birthday! Weird fuzz with a little shine. Never mind the crazy bald neighbor behind me. :)

Me responding to the "how do you feel?" question.

Proof that one can smile through discomfort and pain after treatment even if they have no make up on.

...and again. I lived in pajamas after treatment. Medi-port is visible. I never try to hide it. My theory...why hide cancer? Awareness may save someones life.Treatment #11. Almost makeup-less and making a scarf.

Tomorrow I will have Max take pictures of my head. I think my hair is understanding it's time to return. :)

Thank you all for following, listening, helping, feeding, and praying for me and my family these past 7 moths. We appreciate it more then words can express.

Do not be afraid; only believe. (Mark 5:36)

For nothing is impossible with God. (Luke 1:37)

Cast all your anxiety on Him because he cares for you. (1Peter 5:7)

I know, I know!

Hold your horses and get your panties out of a wad. :)

Brace yourself because I have got some news for you!

I'm working on a post in between a million other things. Soon enough, I promise!

PS- I'm wearing a smile. :)

My Punkin's at the Pumpkin Patch!

I can hide behind this one.

Oh yeah? Well, I can pick it up!

Me and my Punkins!

Kalee eyeballing the pumpkin she wants to carve.

He put those red socks on all by himself! Stinker!

Peanut Fest

Saturday we decided to get some fresh air and check out Peanut Fest with one of our friends Bill. It was nice, but not as peanutish as I expected. They did hand out peanuts and let us sample a variety of weird flavored peanuts and butters but nothing knocked my socks off. I'm still Trader Joe's biggest fan when it comes to peanut butter. Peanuts are good but almonds are better. :)

Kalee decided to hand salute a craft while eating peanuts.

Pino and the peanut mobile.

The back of my hat said "Queen Mommy" and NO I am absolutely NOT endorsing what was behind me. I'm just to lazy to edit it.

Bill caught me!

Heads Up and Sit Down

Day 2 of rising before the sun. I must say there is something I absolutely love about the crisp, fresh, mornings of fall. As I departed my residence for my CT Scan, I couldn't help but admire the dark clouds floating across the morning glow. God's beauty! I walked towards the hospital, the flag whipped and the metal clips had a familiar clank against the metal pole. The clanking noise I remember from my school days.

My CT Scan was what I expected...minus the "heads up, I'm going to pass out" part. For some odd reason after the IV, I got that unforgettable feeling. She left the room to fix my contrast cocktail and I scooched my rear end from the lab chair to the floor. I was alone in the room and I didn't want it to turn out like it did that one time...that I passed out and had a seizure while getting blood drawn (my MIL saved my arm form being a pin cushion because the phlebotomist was shocked). Hello?! Have the past 6 months not been enough for me to get over that passing out stuff? I no longer require a complete horizontal position for needle pokes. Must have been the combination of watching her mess with the IV and maybe low blood sugar because I'm hungry 30 seconds after I wake and couldn't eat prior to the test. And how do I think I'm going to find my way through nursing school? Please tell me I'll get over it! Who knows. Two minutes after I elevated my feet I was fine.

Kalee and I had a fantastic Mommy-Daughter day. We had to run some errands and she was such the perfect child. We even browsed clearance racks at the Navy Exchange while sipping on hot chocolate. It was so nice to spend more then just a quick trip to Wal-Mart with her. My baby girl has turned into a little lady!

Why Lumber Funk?

Sometimes I wonder why? Other times I get stumped with timing. Occasionally the crazy "it's for a reason" thought crosses my mind. More times than not I can easily complain about how I feel. But no matter what, nothing in my life can compare to the horrible death Jesus died on that cross for me. Amazing!

To answer to the most common question...I'm feelin' alive my friends!

Today was such a beautiful day. After the husband finished his mid-term, he was quick to enjoy the cool breeze that carried the smell of his chainsaw exhaust. Just call him lumberjack. I was able to do some reflecting on life while listening...which led me to being soooo thankful for the providential relationships in my life. The first, I was 6.

Testing this week, and more next week...but I'm planning on testing Dr. Oz's 'reduce underarm funk' suggestion tomorrow. :)

12...The Magic Number...12!

Praise God!
Six cycles, treatment number 12.... COMPLETE!

I'm scheduled to see my doctor two weeks from today as long as my test results are in when I call the day before. Do not be afraid. Talked to my nurse about my port that lives on my starboard side. I'll see her monthly to get it flushed. :) Maybe in time I'll gain enough guts to honorably discharge it next year. I guess the test results will be a large determining factor for that. Time will tell.

Off to shower, get in comfy pajamas, brush the chemo slime taste out of my mouth, drug up on more anti-nausea stuff and sleep.

Do not be afraid! ;)